Disclaimer: If you are supple at heart and feeble in the mind, this will not be the place for you. I will not apologize for my tainted mouth or any of my pretentious opinions.
That being said let me start my prologue to the magnificent world of blog with a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all that were not in my life until this blessed 2008.
So far in my 29 glorious years on this earth I have managed to cheat death, avoid jail and maintain a comfortable level of sanity (50 percent of the time) while having two gorgeous daughters, marring a man who is both gay and in the Navy (go figure), and becoming a successful accountant and have been gainfully employed for eight years in the medical world.
I do not like or welcome drama, if your it, go the hell away. Period. I do not need you, want you or have any desire to humor you in any way. I believe life is too short to waste time on stupidity. Yes, many will be stuck on the gay husband comment for a second, so I will finish that explanation. I did get married. NO I did not know he was gay. How is that possible you ask, well it is. I just thought he was stupid and naive in the bedroom. Hence my hate of stupidity. I found out he was gay when I came home and found him with my mother’s bra on and my ex’s dead grandmother’s jewelry. I know the normal reaction would to be pissed off at the situation but honestly; I laughed my ass of at him. It explained a lot. Being on Bourbon Street in NO on our honeymoon and not making good use out of the local female talent shows, a shame, a real shame. What a waste. The marriage was annulled and I moved on. Now I do not have any issue with people being gay, but for fuck sake DON’T try to marry me! Now he is married for the fourth time (to a woman) at 28 years of age and expecting his first child. After all, that is what he was going for. So congrats kiddo. Hope that works out well for you.
Now, enough of that. I adore being an accountant. However, I am not your average bean counter. I have heard that, so save your jokes. I have a fire in the belly, eyeball up, turn on a dime attitude. I love being tall. Without four inch stilettos I stand at a hair under six feet. I do wear heals and date men shorter than me. I’m confident so if men are not, that’s their loss. I’ll be sure to keep an eye out for that spine they have on order. I like to relax my mind (does not happen often) by listening to some good written music. This comes in many different genres and focuses. Guess it depends on the mood. I do have a enthusiasm for animals. No I am not referring to any of the ex’s in my life. Exercise, discipline then affection. Works well. Key you should try it sometime with those recruits. You may learn a thing or two. I have owned horses all my life. I ride English. Western riding is man made and unnatural. Last I checked you do not see horses running wild with their nose on the ground snorting sand with that profane four beat canter. Sorry, lope. Let me be correct for you non English speaking folk. I do enjoy many western riding games though. I do team penning. I just do it in an English saddle. Works for me. My pony is of mutt decent being ¾ appaloosa crap and ¼ Quarter horse. Not an ideal mix but I now own the biggest, badass Buckskin I have ever seen. Other than my horses, I have had numerous dogs that you will get to read about at a later point, I like cats to an extent and have found a new found respect for coons.
Enough for now, back to counting beans.
That being said let me start my prologue to the magnificent world of blog with a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all that were not in my life until this blessed 2008.
So far in my 29 glorious years on this earth I have managed to cheat death, avoid jail and maintain a comfortable level of sanity (50 percent of the time) while having two gorgeous daughters, marring a man who is both gay and in the Navy (go figure), and becoming a successful accountant and have been gainfully employed for eight years in the medical world.
I do not like or welcome drama, if your it, go the hell away. Period. I do not need you, want you or have any desire to humor you in any way. I believe life is too short to waste time on stupidity. Yes, many will be stuck on the gay husband comment for a second, so I will finish that explanation. I did get married. NO I did not know he was gay. How is that possible you ask, well it is. I just thought he was stupid and naive in the bedroom. Hence my hate of stupidity. I found out he was gay when I came home and found him with my mother’s bra on and my ex’s dead grandmother’s jewelry. I know the normal reaction would to be pissed off at the situation but honestly; I laughed my ass of at him. It explained a lot. Being on Bourbon Street in NO on our honeymoon and not making good use out of the local female talent shows, a shame, a real shame. What a waste. The marriage was annulled and I moved on. Now I do not have any issue with people being gay, but for fuck sake DON’T try to marry me! Now he is married for the fourth time (to a woman) at 28 years of age and expecting his first child. After all, that is what he was going for. So congrats kiddo. Hope that works out well for you.
Now, enough of that. I adore being an accountant. However, I am not your average bean counter. I have heard that, so save your jokes. I have a fire in the belly, eyeball up, turn on a dime attitude. I love being tall. Without four inch stilettos I stand at a hair under six feet. I do wear heals and date men shorter than me. I’m confident so if men are not, that’s their loss. I’ll be sure to keep an eye out for that spine they have on order. I like to relax my mind (does not happen often) by listening to some good written music. This comes in many different genres and focuses. Guess it depends on the mood. I do have a enthusiasm for animals. No I am not referring to any of the ex’s in my life. Exercise, discipline then affection. Works well. Key you should try it sometime with those recruits. You may learn a thing or two. I have owned horses all my life. I ride English. Western riding is man made and unnatural. Last I checked you do not see horses running wild with their nose on the ground snorting sand with that profane four beat canter. Sorry, lope. Let me be correct for you non English speaking folk. I do enjoy many western riding games though. I do team penning. I just do it in an English saddle. Works for me. My pony is of mutt decent being ¾ appaloosa crap and ¼ Quarter horse. Not an ideal mix but I now own the biggest, badass Buckskin I have ever seen. Other than my horses, I have had numerous dogs that you will get to read about at a later point, I like cats to an extent and have found a new found respect for coons.
Enough for now, back to counting beans.
5 comments:
Awesome, we'll get along just fine. I like the fact that you are your own person and don't care what people think. I have no time for non genuine people in this world. If they don't like what I say or how I say it then they don't have to listen.
do you know key personally, through someone or did you just find him accidently?
I plead the filth. Seriously laughing. I do know key personally, yes. I think we will get a long just fine!
Well if you can't tell me that's ok, I'll just use my imagination along with the content of your comment and just chuckle to myself. I could be snorting laughter out of my nose if I knew the truth but for now I'll settle for just a chuckle.
You so would be choking for sure on that laughing spell...... You will here all about it. I'm sure!
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